How to Heal with Honesty?

Updated: Jul 26, 2020

Do you know a liar or do you lie? Do you know the truth or live by the truth? If you are unafraid to speak the truth always, you are...

ONE a very self-aware person.

TWO you live by that truth at all times.

THREE you are not afraid of any authority figure and most especially your own critical self.

But on the other hand, say someone who regularly lies they are probably...

ONE regularly experience feelings of anxiousness and does not feel a sense of peace within themselves and have very fearful worldviews.

TWO tend to fall sick or injure themselves regularly

THREE have a very apathetic or cynical view of the world and others.

It is true, the majority of us lie and lie we do regularly! It takes a very self-aware and meditative person to rise above being a liar. Think back to a time when you had a friend you despised but tolerated them enough to see them every weekend or to the time that you exaggerated your level of experience or competency at a job interview.

Why do liars feel sick, get injured, feel anxious, be jealous, have a fearful or apathetic view of the world? The truth is because liars do not heal, they remain broken and in a state of dis-ease all their life until the lies just become one big juggling act and the balls too many to handle comes tumbling down and life literally falls to pieces.

So this brings me to the big question, who exactly is a liar?

By liars, I am not referring just to those who pathological lie. Pathological liars are persons who cannot but help themselves but lie. Lies for them are as common as the air they breathe. Pathological liars do not know of any other way to live but tell lies. They are so far down that tunnel that turning back is like finding the light of day out of a rabbit wren!

No, I also mean the liars who are mostly harmful to themselves! Pathological liars hurt others, this type of liar hurt only themselves. The liars I mean are those who berate themselves, put-downs themselves, self-hate, self-sabotage or self-harm. When you self hate, you basically are lying to yourself. You are no better than that lover who cheats, you are cheating yourself out of life.

Are you serious about wanting to feel more joy in your life? Well, can I tell you the number one solution for that? Stop lying, just stop it, just stop it right now!

When you feel that pang of jealousy and envy at that thin girl on Instagram, that rich & successful, famous man or women on Facebook or the boy who could pull off tricks that you cannot do, you are lying to yourself. With this ultra-connected internet age, people may look at other people's lives, see an insta-perfect moment, and in that instance, feel like your life sux compared to that person. You know what, you have just successfully lied to yourself! At that moment you had just cut yourself down with a lie that said you are not good enough or that your own life is inferior. Another lie you tell to yourself is by laughing at another person because it covers up for your own insecurity.

Don't compare, you are good enough! That negative emotion doesn't serve you, and it definitely will not move you out of your own situation and get you to the place you want to be in.

When you get angry, you are lying to yourself because it's all small stuff. The truth is you are lucky just to be alive.

For instance, when you feel grief, you are lying to yourself because the truth is you are afraid of your own mortality. You grieve for the one you lost because you believe a lie that says that you seize to exist after you die. You live a life of joy when you acknowledge the truth that birth is a miracle and so is death.

Stop lying to yourself, stop it, stop it right now!

Every negative emotion you feel is a lie. Every negative emotion you feel because of the lies you tell yourself is a lie. The way you know a lie is how you feel in the moment you say it or think it. That's how you know you are lying to yourself and others. Having joy in your life and telling lies in your life is an absolute oxymoron! Think about it, have you ever felt joy when you'd just said a lie? No never ever would you feel joy in lying, even if it gets what you want in the short term, there is absolutely no joy that comes out of it in the long run. Think about it, it's true.

Those who are self-aware, willing to look at their demons dead in the face begin to heal their life. This is the hardest pill to swallow for many of us.